Monday, January 29, 2007

The "Grillz" Bill


State Rep. John J. DeBerry Jr. has decided to tackle some of the more important issues facing Tennessee right now. He is currently introducing a law that would prevent anyone but a dentist from taking impressions in order to make "grillz." The statute targets mall kiosks and jewelry stores that take the dental impressions and has the effect of denying the youth and the poor of Tennessee equal access to this essential hip hop accessory. Under the proposed law, only dentists could take impressions for "the fabrication of a cosmetic metal apparatus to be worn in the human mouth, whether or not such apparatus features silver, gold, or platinum caps, jeweled inlays, or any other cosmetic features." DeBerry says of his bill "I guess we can't outlaw the jewelry for your mouth, but we can make sure that it if your children go in there, they are not getting an impression of their teeth with a mold and material that someone else has just used." I say the hip-hop generation should rise up and protest this reprehensible intrusion on the group's urgent claim over its own destiny and body, claims implicit in the very meaning of liberty.

13 comments:

d a k said...

Marc, you're sounding more like Clint Bolick every day... :)

Marc said...

Did you like how I ended this random post with an ode' to Casey v. Planned Parenthood?

d a k said...

Yeah, that was nice. At first I just thought you had worked the language of Casey into your regular vocabulary.

Marc said...

Well... I can understand why. As a "liberal" isn't it akin to scripture for me? ;)

BA said...

Finally a use for Carolene footnote no. 4. The hip hop nation a discrete and insular minority.

BA said...

That was a hilarious law joke. Of course with all the bling coming out of their mouths they aren't discrete, and with their silky smooth rhymes (Johnny Drama) they aren't insular.

Marc said...

For those that want in on the joke.

Simon Birch said...

That whole joke went way over my head. I don't know if it's the fact that i'm short, or working in a field where I don't have to use my brain. Too many big words, the only recognizable ones were milk and four! Good riddance

BA said...

It's totally worth it to read Marc's hyperlink. Law jokes are the best. Even if it doesn't apply at all to what I said it did.

Rob said...

Man, if you want real jokes -
Lawsies...

blondemama said...

Can you remove the "grill"? I read the post and could only think about what a horrible mistake it would be if it was permanent.

Maui said...

Good thing I don't live in T...I was planning on picking up a Grill this weekend playa.

SmootheP said...

Maybe this isn't the right place for this, but lawyer jokes are lame.